Back To School

I’m at King Eddies (my secondary school). It looks empty, the coach has just dropped us off. Maybe no one else is there yet. Inside I begin running very fast through the corridors and down some stairs. Someone is chasing me (AS?).

I am walking down the hill from the lower school building to the upper school. I see the coach turning round in the staff car park. I knock on the door but the driver ignores me. There is another coach parked there. I carry on walking It is cold, there is frozen snow on the ground. I pass a gap in the hedge. Through the gap I can see the entrance to the upper school, but it looks different.

L. is standing on the steps. She walks towards me. There are thorns sticking out in the gap, but she comes through, and then I go through the other way. I walk across the grass toward the entrance. There are wide steps leading to the double doors which are wide open, and beyond is a large hall in darkness.

I go inside. I see a woman kneeling, she has short blond hair. She is holding a child. I think it is L. A voice from the side tells me to go somewhere. MI think that’s when I find myself in my flat.

I’m at home in my bed. I’m huddled under the blankets, I don’t want to get up. There is also a bath in my room? A man is doing exercises on me, squeezing me and pulling my joints, like I used to do on my autistic boy.

Now I am in the lounge. It looks like my dads place, their black sideboard is there. There are two camp beds on the floor. Me and L. have been asleep there. The only place to go to the toilet is in a plastic washing up bowl. I have to have a number two. I am trying to wipe myself with a kitchen towel but it starts getting everywhere.

It is dusty and there are lots of cobwebs. My mum walks past the room and asks us to clean up.

L. watches while I clean. I am polishing the sideboard. Grace comes in to help, I let her spray the polish.